What would it mean for your life or business if you had the influencing skills to connect more deeply with people, close more deals, and create the kind of trust that fuels long-term interactions? It’s not easy to do, but it’s possible — and on this episode of Leverage Chase Hughes of Ellipsis Behavior provides insight into how we can break through the social masks to expose every person we meet (in a good way). This is a fascinating conversation and Chase shares free resources you can use to understand people better, so be sure you take the time to listen.
Influencing skills can be learned, but won’t be effective unless you are mature within yourself.
Chase Hughes says that many times a person comes to him to learn influencing skills because of an important meeting or negotiation on their calendar. They want him to teach them how to influence people and win them over, but it doesn’t take long before Chase gathers that they are so undisciplined personally that they don’t even make their own bed consistently. What he’s pointing out is that a person who is able to influence others effectively is a person who is self-disciplined. It’s not about the bed being made, it’s about the order and self-control needed to take on challenges — both mundane and high-stakes — and do what it takes to win. This is an example of the incredible insights into human behavior Chase has, and this conversation serves to show what you can do by learning how to lead and influence more effectively.
It’s vital to know the difference between real authority and perceived authority.
There have been fascinating experiments over the years that have shown how one aspect of how we are wired as humans is to respond with deference to authority figures, even if the people in question are not real authorities but are only perceived that way by us. In this episode, Chase Hughes talks about what it takes to be a true authority and what it takes to overcome your own propensity to defer to those you perceive as authorities who really have no right or place to dictate any part of your life. You’ll be fascinated by what he has to share.
Don’t ask what people on your team are good at. What do they want to be SEEN as good at?
During this conversation, Chase Hughes brought up the common team-building advice you hear that you need to put the right person in the right slot within your team. That’s true, but his definition of how you accomplish that is far different than what the so-called gurus are saying. In his study, it’s become apparent that you don’t necessarily need to ensure that the person most skilled at a task is placed in that role. Instead, you need to find out what the person being considered wants to be SEEN as being proficient at. If you can place them in roles that fit that desire you’ll find them to be a motivated achiever in that position — much more so than the person who already has the skills to do the job. You can hear more insights like this from Chase, on this episode of Leverage.
Focus on human needs to be more effective.
When Ari asked his guest, Chase Hughes, for 3 tips to help listeners be more effective, Chase said it’s important to focus on human needs. When you are able to identify the real human needs in any interaction — be it a relationship, a product development meeting, a sales presentation, etc. — you’ll be able to identify the real issues at the core of the conversation. Those are the things you want to focus on because true effectiveness hinges on their resolution. Chase and his organization are doing some amazing things to help their clients develop greater influencing skills, understand and build stronger teams, and much more, so don’t miss out on what he shares on this episode.
Outline of This Episode
- [0:03] Ari’s intro of today’s guest and special guest co-host, Brittney Martinson.
- [1:04] How Chase became interested in human behavior and interactions.
- [2:15] The castle analogy Chase uses to explain our behavior toward others.
- [5:05] How the ability to read people can humanize your own interactions.
- [8:10] The tools Chase covers in his book to help you read people better.
- [13:03] Comparing real authority to perceived authority.
- [15:55] The 5 characteristics that trigger an authority state in the human brain.
- [19:40] Small picture gratitude and big picture gratitude in mind at the same time.
- [20:58] Why it’s important to figure out what people want to be seen as being good at.
- [23:06] Chase’s top 3 pieces of advice to be more effective.
- Ellipsis Behavior — Chase’s organization
- BOOK: The Ellipsis Manual
- www.EllipsisBehavior.com/Leverage — get your free resource
- Chase on Twitter
- The Obedience Experiment